Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Saturday September 22, 2012
Last Trip - 
Our last camping trip of the season was cold and overcast but it was still camping.  Which means it was still time to reconnect with each other and ourselves.  

Charlie and his buddy Freddy.  I think he would steal Papa's dog if he could.

Men talk.

Even though one of these guys aren't related by blood, I still look at this picture and one word comes to mind.  Generations.

Morning jewels on a cold morning.

A morning walk with John, Charlie and Freddy.

More reminders that change is constant.

A self portrait from my photo walk with Kenzie.


Sunday September 23, 2012.
Heading Back to Reality - 

September 3, 2012.
The Mask -
Sometimes when I stand at the bathroom mirror, applying my makeup, I am aware that I am really just applying a mask.  On days that I feel unsure of myself, I know that I hide behind the  foundation, rouge and gloss, and I hope that after I apply the mask, I will become the girl who looks back at me in the mirror.  

September 4, 2012.
Walking Into Grade Two -
He's excited and ready for all of the possibilities.

September 5, 2012.
Time -
The kitchen doorway is covered in years of grime.  It can not be washed properly - it is here where I track the passage of time.  These marks represent my children's milestones, growth spurts, and also serve as a reminder to me to cherish the fleeting moments of their childhood.

September 6, 2012.
Chompers -
I worked late again and felt bad that I missed dinner with my family.  When I got home, Charlie was already in bed, but not yet asleep.  He was waiting to show me his new smile.  I was glad he stayed awake.

September 6, 2012.
I sat in the tub until the water turned cool, because I needed the time alone.

September 8, 2012.
Windy and Rainy -
The wind and rain made going to work on a Saturday easier.  A little anyways.  

September 9, 2012.
One week into the school year and everyone in the house has come down with a nasty cold.

September 10, 2012.
Left Behind -
On Friday night, there was a huge party in the field behind my house.  Really?  I thought to myself.  Back when I was in high school, a bush party required a bush not a field.  One of the party goers left their bong behind.  I'm thinking of bringing it in the house and putting dried flowers in it.

September 11, 2012.
Running -
For me it's impossible to learn without making mistakes.  I learned a lot today, but my mistakes left me feeling angry and discouraged.  So I went for a run.  I burned off my anger and found peace acceptance and forgiveness.  I will mess things up, I will make mistakes and that is part of my journey.

September 12, 2012.
Lost -
This picture was a complete accident, and the only picture I took on September twelfth.  Somewhere in between trying to master the new job, maintain my home and support my husband and family, the passion it takes to complete a 365 that I'm proud of is missing. I can't find the time energy for the pictures and words that I once used to define and clarify my values, and that makes me feel anxious and lost.

September 13, 2012.
Girl Talk -
When I was pregnant with my daughter, people would ask me if I was hoping for a boy or a girl.  My answer was always the same -girl.  My answer usually made people gasp a little, "You should just hope for a healthy baby" they would say.  Of course I wanted a healthy baby, a healthy girl baby - and if they didn't want an answer they shouldn't have asked the question.  The point is, even before she entered my life, I couldn't picture it without her.  Each and every day I am thankful for her.

September 14, 2012.
Five Minutes -
A five minute break was all I got today. I sat in the cool breeze and basked in the warm sun, and enjoyed every second of it.

September 15, 2012.
Best Brothers Ever -
basement edition.

September 16, 2012.
Cookies and Milk -
I heard him pull a chair up to the cupboard and get out an afternoon snack for himself.  Then he quietly sat down at the table where I was cutting fabric.  Sitting there he looked grown up and small all at the same time.

September 17, 2012.
Old Story -
The pages of the book were scattered on the dew moistened ground.  For some reason I was attracted to the pages and took a quick snapshot of one of the pages.  After, when I went to edit the picture on Instagram, I read the page.  The words and message reflected how I felt about the past few weeks of my own life.  The old story was my old story and it needed to be thrown away.  It was a gentle reminder that the universe knows.

September 18, 2012.
On the Line -
At some point you have to decide.  What is the most important thing on the line?  Your home?  Your job? Your family? Yourself?  What if balance is impossible and you have to choose - What is most important to you right now?

September 19, 2012.
Finding Time In Shorter Days -

" Change is a measure of time, and in autumn, time seems speeded up. 
What was is not, and never again will be; what it is is change."
~ Edward Teale. 

September 20, 2012.
Eye Opener -
A trip to the Love Shop left me feeling more virginal than I had in years.

September 21, 2012.
Final Trip -
We went to Valens Conservation Area for our final camping trip of the season.  Valens is our go to place to camp, and each time we drive into the campground, I feel like I am coming home.

Monday, September 10, 2012

Monday August 27, 2012.
Pumped Up Kicks-
We went back to school shopping for the kids.  It was obvious to us that Josh had grown, but we didn't realize that he had grown so much.  His last pair of jeans we a boy's 28 we bought him a men's 30.  The shoes that he was wearing were a size 7, we had to buy him a size 10.  I am officially the mother of a man-child. 

Tuesday August 28, 2012.
Fashion Show -
Charlie presented his annual Back to School fashion show for us on Tuesday.  You can tell he felt pretty cool in his new threads.  (cool, threads - is it even cool to say cool or threads anymore?) Gosh, I can't believe that he's going into Grade two.

Wednesday August 29, 2012.
Underwhelmed and Overtired. - 

Thursday August 30, 2012.
Nighttime at the Park -
Working full time means making time for each other where ever and when ever we can.  Thursday night as the sun was setting and the Blue Moon was rising, John and I went to the park with Charlie.

Friday August 31, 2012.
Hi Ho, Hi Ho -
It's off to work I go, and for the record I don't look nearly as jovial as my friend the gnome did.  I'm enjoying my new job, but feeling frustrated that it is taking me longer than I expected to get the hang of things.  I hate being new.

Friday September 1, 2012.
Family Game Night -
Charlie wanted to play Lego Creationary with me on Friday night.  The two of us started playing, and before we knew it, the rest of the family had joined in.  We ignored the rules, and everyone played and built at the same time.  When one of us had finished a creation, the rest of us would guess what it was.  Family game nights are always fun, but this one even more so because it unfolded without planning.  My heart was so full of happiness, I had to take a picture - even if it meant annoying my teen aged daughter who did her best to hide from my camera.

Sunday September 2, 2012.
Easy Like Sunday Morning -
Charlie eased into Sunday.  He spent some extra time snuggling with Mr.Bunny and Mr.Blankee on the couch before he began his day.

Saturday August 25, 2012.
Big and Little - 
My oldest and youngest have a love/hate relationship.  The problem is that Charlie knows exactly which buttons to hit to make his sister go crazy  AND he takes great pleasure in doing so. 

~ Charlie's Zoolander pose.  Kenzie trying her best to ignore him.

~At the beach for a sunset swim.  Another Summer Bucket list item checked off.

~ Shark Attack!!

~ Coming Together.

~ Charlie had us performing "The Stuffie Olympics"

Sunday August 26, 2012.
Transitioning -
A colorful reminder that we are amid the last days of summer.

~ One of Summer's last blooms.

Monday August 20, 2012.
Scrubbed Clean and Ready to Go: Another Week-
For my second week away, my work decided that it was best if they changed my hotel.  Instead of being downtown, this week I am staying in a small town just outside of Kitchener.  Maybe because it was so much like home I felt both safer and more homesick then I did the first week.    
Tuesday August 21, 2012.
Feeling Lonesome -

~Reminding myself that I'm still me with a reflection in the hotel door.
~ green card

~ the long haul.

Wednesday August 22, 2012.
Oxygen -
There is an expression that in order to take care of anyone else, you have to give the oxygen mask to yourself first.  Being away from my family has made me realize that my family is my oxygen.  I gain strength from them.  Whatever support I lend to my family, I get back tenfold.  They are visiting tonight, and I can't wait to see them.

~ Morning and Evening Shadows - The day started with such promise but somewhere around mid day, it fell apart.  The constant input of  information is making my brain hurt and has left me feeling insecure.  By the time training ended, I needed my family more then ever.

~Time for fun

~ Turns out that it was too much "fun" for Kenzie and I - we decided to check out some of the outlet stores in the strip mall instead.  Walking in between stores, we saw yet another amazing sunset.

~ Our goodbye.  I've had too many of these lately.

Thursday August 23, 2012.
Cruising for a Cause -
As part of my training, Anita, my regional manager, wanted to meet me and take me out for dinner.  I was looking forward to meeting Anita, but the only problem with that was August 23 was A&W's annual Multiple Sclerosis fundraiser -Cruising for a Cause.  It's a night that I've attended ever since my cousin Angela was diagnosed with MS, and a night I didn't want to miss.  So I asked Anita how she felt about burgers. Turns out that Anita likes burgers and cars.  We hit it off immediately and I think I made a new friend.   

Friday August 24, 2012.
Goodbye Hilton -
I'm going home.