1 Second Everyday: November 26 - December 27

December is crazy for everyone.  I get that.  But if you work at a toy store in December, it is a special kind of crazy.  The month started with singing, dancing and music at the North BurLINKton talent show that I helped organize and volunteered at.  Being backstage with the artists was a lot of fun. The event raised over $600.  The money paid for Christmas dinner for many families.  Other highlights from the month include dinner with friends where we promised to get together more or at least plan one joint camping trip this summer.  We celebrated my brother Jon's 50th birthday with a surprise party.  Other celebrations included cheering on Charlie at his Christmas Concert and bursting with pride when Josh finally passed his G1 licence.  Now to get him behind the wheel!  I counted down the days until Kenzie finished writing her exams and all  five members of my family were once again under the same roof. She worked so hard those last few weeks.  I am so proud of the way she handled herself.  And oh yeah, it was Christmas too.  It was a month of awesome celebrations spaced between days of getting shit done.  I am also sure that without this project most of it would have passed by in a blur.  

1 Second a Day - October - November

Pumpkins, Halloween and road hockey put to the music of Kiss.  It was quite a month.  

A Year Of Seconds

When I gave up my Picture a Day project, I was ready to.  The daily commitment of taking a picture and writing about it was growing thin.  I began to feel I had captured and commented of just about every aspect of our lives.  

But then I missed it.  Not the work of doing it, but I missed having a record of days.  So when I saw people recording their daily seconds, I thought that this might be a something that I could handle.  I'm so glad I did.  

Here is 365 of our seconds smooshed together.  

Summer Round Up

We began the Summer 2015 with one of the best camping trips we have had in a long time.  Papa joined us and the weekend was full of games, laughter and fun.

The next big thing that happened was that Josh graduated high school.  He worked hard for this and has grown up so much this past year.  We got him a pocket watch to mark the occasion.  Josh is going back for a victory lap, then who knows?  The future is yours for the taking buddy.  Way to Go.  xo

Charlie had his tenth birthday this summer.  Our littlest man is not so little anymore.  We celebrated his birthday with a Glow in the Dark party at home.  I was worried that it was going to be a wash out, but the rain stopped and the boys were able to launch water bottle rockets and have scooter races outside.  They also had a photo booth, a Nerf Gun fight, pizza and cake.  I was happy to hear a couple of boys saying that it was the best party ever as they left.

Once school was out it was time for our annual family camping trip.  This year we went to Silent Lake Provincial Park.  It was a beautiful park.  I especially loved being back on the Canadian Shield. It reminded me of my childhood at Leonard Lake.

There has been so much change this year.  Charlie is the big kid now and the big kids are on the verge of adulthood.  Josh has graduated high school and has a part time job, Kenzie has moved into residence at Fanshawe College.   Things are changing faster than I'd like to admit.  Both John and I are proud of where our kids are going and a little sad that this magical time with them is coming to an end.

These Small Hours Still Remain

I have put off thinking about the goodbye, but the closer we get to moving day, the harder it is to ignore the fact that my girl is leaving home for the first time.  She is ready for this, but I feel the same way I did before she was born.  Just like I couldn't imagine what our day to day life would look like together, I am having a hard time imagining what life will look like without our daily interactions.

 

Some advice for you as you go:

1. open your heart to new friendships, but be selective to opening your heart to new "loves"
2. for god's sake be sanitary. 
3. be patient with yourself, your teachers, new ideas
4. have faith in yourself.  you are more capable than you know. 
5. water.booze.water.booze
6. you are happiest when you move your body. make time for your workouts
7. its a line of credit: you have to pay it back.
8. show up for class. and do your homework.  don't be a Sunday night essay writer.  
9. bathrooms and fridges are best cleaned weekly - don't be gross. 
10. call home.  

inspired.

its hard to say what has inspired me to sit down and write today.  what do i want to share today that i havent wanted to share for the last six months or so

i havent sat doen to write a blog post in so long.  my creativity has found other, more private forms.  ive spent the better part of last year, exploring - sometimes by myself, sometimes with my best friend.  ive opened up to possibilities.  instead of capturing my life with digital images, i have painted, with brushstrokes.  

with paint, and words, and pens, i found a new kind of expression.  a new way to find my voice. new pathways to explore.  and ive wanted to do this quietly - sharing what i discovered about my life, myself and my dreams with select few.  

this time has felt like a rebirth.  new.  sweet.  optimistic. 

i keep asking myself how do i want to feel. 

eager, playful, soulful, alive.  
courageous, bold, free.  
loved, connected, inspired.  

if this quiet exploration has reveled anything to me it is this:  trust the journey. 

the other this i was surprised to learn about myself is that i want to inspire.  
i want to lift people up and encourage. 

i wish to breathe life into people.  
empower them to believe in their dreams. their creativity. 
to paint their own picture, to tell their own story.  

Being Real

When I turned 40 I wrote a kick ass post about what 40 was going to look like for me.

I was excited for forty and wanted to meet it with a clear sense of who I was.  I wanted to be present.  I stopped writing publicly and started to art journal.  In a way I was meeting my grown up self for the first time.  

What did I want? (time, space, connections) 
What did I crave? (chocolate cake and coffee was really about sweetness,softness and energy.)
What made me greedy and when was I generous. 
And above all else How did I want to Feel?  
Capable.  Sensual.  Playful.  Connected.  Brave.  Curious.  Worthy.  Free.  

I felt that there were parts of my life that were the exact opposite of how I wanted to feel.  Every day I got farther and farther away from how I wanted to feel.  I wasn't being true to myself.  

So I started over.  I quit my job. I distanced myself from negative people.  I signed up for a COLLEGE course.  I made real, tangible goals for myself.  Everyday I did a little bit more to make me feel a little more authentic.  

A look at my authentic life...